Darcy
Schmidt
Design		 costumes featured in

"Exposing Dr. Darcy and the Dirty Dozen Fashion Show"

at Kiss & Tell, Victoria, 2001
Darcy in muscle man outfit Darcy in costume strutting through crowd Darcy picking up his crate Darcy setting down his crate Darcy doing a little dance on his crate
I start the show by coming out and parading through the audience. I don't know what it is that the person in the foreground is holding, but it looks like a honey dripper. We are in a sex shop so it could also be a "probe" or something. There are hordes of people here and it is a tightly packed little place but people get out of my way as I work my way around the room. "Groove is in the Heart" by Dee-Lite is playing, and people do not know what to expect. "Hey! here is the perfect wooden box!" "It seems to be just the right size to plunk down here in front of you..." "Maybe I'll just climb up on it and do a little dance in your face..."
Darcy grinding the mple bottom of his costume into a guest Darcy slips off the caveman outfit Darcy in costume dancing in faux leopard jock strap "Drum
roll,
please!"		 Darcy removing the jock to expose his costumes huge unit
The outfit is quite bulky and everyone is eager to grab a handful of my ample bottom. "Oooh! It's getting kinda warm in here so I'll just slip this off..." "Is it hot enough in here for ya?!?" There's nothing like a nearly naked muscley dude to get everyone all hot 'n bothered! I climb up on the counter and peep off the jock strap to reveal my gi-normous 3 foot member which I twirl in peoples faces.
hot chick in mens muscle vest and sporran chick shows off her outfit dude in muscle vest from behind Hermaphrodite outfit with bondage gear Hermaphrodite outfit from behind
Ready for the fashion show? Some hot chicks and dudes come out and do this little parade around the space. They are all wearing these men's muscle vests with matching sporrans complete with generously sized hard-ons. The space is tightly packed so this little presentation is quite "up close and personal". No need for Viagra here! They are joined by a very sexy hermaphrodite who makes his/her/its way through the crowd. he/she/it is all decked out in some very intricate leather bondage-fetish gear from Kiss & Tell.
Hermaphrodite outfit from behind again "Ta-Daah! Look at me, everyone!" Hermaphrodite limps off to get changed Merman outfit Merman works the room Merman shows his arm pit
Having to bump and grind "for two" has taken its toll, and he/she/it makes his/her/its way back to the dressing room with the other models to get changed. A truly stunning "Mer-man" appears. Oh what fun! He works the room like a pro, dazzling the audience with his finery. We even get a peek at his hairless arm pit.
Merman unzips Merman whips it out Merman walks through crowd Where
did
that
come
from
?!?		 Large blue sexy fish outfit
What on earth is he doing there? And just when you think that this outfit couldn't possibly be rude... ...he whips out his 3 ft retractable penis... ...and cuts a swath through the audience with it. Check out this big dark blue "Sexy Fish" and its big thick member.
pink sexy fish outfit pink sexy fish outfit shows his stuff back side of sea urchin outfit as it walks by Sexy Sea Anemone outfit
Another "Sexy Fish" appears...
 ...and prances around. The angle of the earth suddenly shifts as a "Sexy Sea Urchin" strolls by... ...joined by a stunning "Sexy Sea Anemone".
putting piercing in Penis outfit Darcy in Penis outfit receiving flowers Hermaphrodite getting groped girl from out of town gropes hermaphrodite and dude in muscle vest hermaphrodite and dude in muscle vest cozy up to each other
I jump up on the counter and perform a "live" genital piercing demo on my penis outfit, which I adorn with a fancy piece of hoop "jewelry". The crowd goes nuts and I am presented with an exquisite bouquet of flowers.

"...and I'd like to thank the academy for all of their support..."		 The models "pick up" audience members. The hermaphrodite scores often! And everyone lives happily ever after!
END
A huge thank you to everyone who helped out with putting on this event. I won't mention your names in particular in case you work somewhere conservative where they might fire your butt if they knew what kind of monkey business that you get up to...

Thanks to the staff, the models and MC, the bartenders and caterers, the photographers, my hosts who put me up for an eternity, everyone who came and had a great time, and anyone I may have missed.

Special thanks go out to "'Nita", "wee Georgie", "JP", "Maggie" and "Stock" for being such great sports.
Darcy
Schmidt
Design		 go to: live art costumes sexy fish paintings video
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